Insults and innuendo

[dshobbies]

Okay, I asked a new thread be started so I’m doing it. Damn, I don't know why I feel it so necessary to respond but… I’m referring to what I call negative posts. It is not my opinion now, nor ever, to restrict a free exchange of ideas and even criticisms.

I called for the banning of Bob, trkdoc714, because his posts contain insults and innuendo. I referred to Kathy’s comment that mean statements hurt and though directed to her own experiences, it still is generically applicable. Specifically, those statements to which I refer are "a non-GPN network surgeon" and "and his medical tour guide" in his two most recent posts.

It is these one-liners that I find offensive and insulting and why I suggested Bob be banned. I had privately asked this same consideration of him awhile ago but to no avail. FYI, there are no network surgeons and Mark is not a medical tour guide - for anyone. No one is ever forced or coerced to use his services. He doesn't place a hex on you or wish you anything evil if you choose not to.

If you care to go back and read some of Bob's 'recent' posts, you'll find similar mean spirited and spiteful statements hidden in his 'caring' posts. The inclusion of these remarks negates any positive intent, however otherwise stated. This was and is my basis for asking he be banned. The omitting of these snippets is all I ask. If he doesn't include these hurtful or nasty comments, which serve no purpose, then I have no problem. Until then, I don't feel a public forum should contain this type of inflammatory remark.

And just for the asking, does anyone else find these very deliberate affronts acceptable? Would you find them objectionable if directed at you? Am I alone and unreasonable in which case I humbly apologize to both the members of this forum and Bob and ask your forgiveness?

Dale

Mark, if you think I'm out of line, please delete this!

[Maria]

Re banning people I think that Mark is very good about allowing people to air their opinions and even state things that other forum creators would definately ban a person for without even so much as a notice and some juicy insults on top of it while the person cannot even reply because of being banned.

I don't think people should use the forum to insult or bad mouth anyone as I feel the adult manner of saying something to someone is with some diplomacy and politely. If one feels there is something important to state or to state his or her opinion re experience or knowledge that seems appropriate but without belittling anyone else or or trying to engage anyone in a battle.

Got a grudge ~ this isn't the place to air it as far as I'm concerned. Got a true personal story based on experience and want to express it seems ok.

Want to be inflammatory~ write your story down and read it several times and think about it.. is there a way it carry the same weight and sentiment without being inflammatory, mean or cruel then post it here and keep the other version for yourself. Use it to keep a personal journal. It's an interesting read ( I did this myself after my *life changing* failed L4 percutaneous discectomy).

Anyone who has been thru a failed surgery or very bad experience and suffers a tremendous loss is going to go thru stages of grieving and probably express themselves quite differently than if he or she were feeling well or had a successful surgical outcome.. that much we all know.

All of our perceptions may differ at a certain time esp. if we are feeling like a victim of circumstance and wrongdoing however that is why I think a person undergoing such major potentially life changing event such as spine surgery should be well aware that success is not guaranteed. Outcome is not guaranteed.

Go in knowing you are taking a chance really~ call it a leap of faith or whatever one will but I think it's a chance ~ hopefully to recover your life.

I've never known Mark to use magic tricks or any type of coercing or deceptive methods to get patients.. much of the time I think he gives away his time..

Surgeons and places of surgery will do what they will. It's unfortunate that sometimes things go very very wrong and sometimes yes, there is definately accountability beyond just saying "it's the way the patient responded to the surgery" but this is a whole different topic. Failed, botched up, gone horribly wrong surgeries or whatever.. yes even I remember feeling like I wanted to sue my surgeon tho I couldn't.. felt that way tho and would have posted it too probably had a forum like this been around.. had to come to grips/terms with myself tho and what my *new* life was like after a very failed L4 percutaneous disctomy.


I'm not addressing anyone in particular~ Just the general spine public that posts here or lurks here even. Thanks for bringing this topic up Dale and again, I'm not addressing anyone in particular as I've not even read all the posts but am thinking more of past *stuff*... and just the flow of the forum in general.

[JeffreyD]

I was going to write about this issue, but Dale said it eloquently and to the point.
I agree with you, Dale.
-Jeff

[ans]

"I'm not addressing anyone in particular"

You're talking about me and the Long People are telling me to do things. Well, there's another week at Thalians.

What happened to my sense of humor?