Jess,
Your post made me smile. I remember feeling everything you're feeling now. It's easy for me to say fear not but that 'shell shock' expression is real. You planned and planned for the unknown. You had all your ducks in a row but forgot to include your brain
Yes, when you get home you'll look back and smile too but that's a little ways off right now. Try to take your thumb out of your mouth and relax. Think about all of us who are smiling at the memory. Think about that man you love so much who is there to support the woman he loves. With him you can do anything. Go ahead and cuddle for you won't be able to for awhile.
BTW, I agree with you about immigrants. I now look at them differently too.
My thoughts are with you, Dale