Friday someone bought the Little Girl and I have been crying ever since. I don't know why I agreed to sell her, I have really been kicking myself for doing it. At the time I questioned whether I would be able to care for her with my current back issues and possible upcoming surgery but I feel like I sold my child!
Her Mommy, Lilly, was VERY young to be having puppies. I helped her with the delivery of the pups. With Little Bitsy, I had to suction her mouth out and stimulate her to breath in the first moments of her life. Had I not been there she likely would not have lived. From that first day through about four weeks of age, twice a day I held her and Lilly in the ‘nursing chair’ and made sure that she was getting at least some breast milk. I also supplemented her feedings with a bottle every day. I have never had a puppy that I had to care for as much as her. From the fist week she was nearly three times smaller than her siblings. She was almost as much my baby as she was Lilly’s. Every day since her birth I have cared for her to insure that she was able to get enough nutrition because she was not big enough to fend for herself.
Then, my health took a turn for the worse a few weeks ago. My medications were changed and increased and it has just been a very hard time. Little Bit was here in bed with me day and night. At first I claimed that it was so I could care for her and insure her safety, but I think it ended up with her caring for me! She stayed in bed with me, played with me and gave me kisses when I needed it.
I am not usually an emotional person. I think all of my medications have something to do with my current state, but I can not seem to forgive myself for letting Little Bit go. Within a few hours of her leaving, I called the buyer and begged for her to sell her back to me, I even told her to name her price, but she told me she was too attached!
I still miss my Little Bit.
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