I really don't understand my doctors anymore. I think they look at me as the plaque. I struggled working and trying to get help, wasn't able to work much, etc. Wasn't untill I was about to loose my family and everything I owned that I said enough was enough and applied for disability. I stopped work in June 2009, struggled to work for 1 1/2 years and had 2 surgeries. One doctor accusatorily asked me how much narcotics I was taking. Told me I had to stop taking them before he would do surgery. I told him I wasn't taking any. My last surgery improved my leg pain but I still get these feelings of burning that I have had for some time and increase with activity. It is getting worse slowly with just light activity around the house. But doing things is the spice of life and gives meaning to life. My headaches come and go. Changing possitions or lying down doesn't feel right. I basicly can only sleep in one possition. When I get still, I become more aware of the ache/burning in my body but it is more in my legs, neck and head. I saw a neurologist recently and he said my cord looks good and doesn't see any signs of myelopathy. But sometimes I wonder because I feel like I walk funny in the evenings. I can tell my gate changes. Doctors sort of look at you funny when they read you have depression and anxiety. Trouble is most of them haven't a clue about it. I feel like my anxiety and depression is exacerbated by not knowing what is truly going on with my body. It is also natural to worry about what the future will be like. I feel like I get treated like a second class citizen because I ask questions and want to know things. But, they clam up when you ask them and I think it makes them defensive. Like for instance, I get swelling in my legs and I take a diuretic to control my edema (I am a large person but not really over weight, been active working hard my whole life). Sometimes I have difficulty breathing at night, wake up with tight chested feeling and aching pain in chest. I use CPAP machine that was suposed to fix it and it did for some time. I am extremely sensitive to salt and water. If I drank a bottle of gatorade, I feel like I will explode. My eyes will get puffy and I get tight chested and edema will increase in legs. All weird stuff. Something is broke somewhere. Had a cardiologist say something was wrong with my heart but he eventually could not find anything. Sometimes, I feel like it is a conversion disorder type thing that has been caused from stress and pain. But, If is being cause by intermittant pressure in my spine or somehow pressure on my sympathetic nervous system, I would want to know. If it is obvious, the surgeon or doctor will go after it. If it is subtle, they will look past it and tell you to loose weight or get more sleep or less stress. I feel like my stress is built in. Thise edem thing started in around 2005 when it peaked and doctors just blamed it on high blood pressure. I was in chronic pain and working reduced hours and getting the dwindles. I kept telling them something was wrong and they just put me on higher and higher blood pressure medications and prozac, etc. I landed in the ER several times with a low low heart rate and very high blood pressure and burning feeling and pressure in chest, difficulty sleeping because when I when to bed, it was hard to breath. Anytime I can forget about my body is a great moment. That I the way I try to live. Unfortunately, it just comes back to haunt me. I am 52 years old and parts of me definitely are worn out. I have started to feel a slight increase in the mechanical pain in my lower back area which concerns me. I hate the stigma of being disabled. I walk and talk and I am careful what I eat, I get in the pool as much as I can and just keep my body moveing. I volunteer at least 2 times a week and teach math to grade-schoolers. I try to stay on the tylenol as much as possible sometimes I use hydrocodone when I can't take it anymore. NSAIDS are sort of out of the picture because they greatly increase my swelling and edema. Took them for years.
I will send you my radiology reports. Maybe you have opinion. Terry
Quote:
Originally Posted by mmglobal
Terry,
It sounds like the 'fourth one is a charm' and you are finally fused in your lumbar spine. You mention some pretty lousy continuing pain. Do they believe it to be from the operated lumbar levels?
How long ago was the cervical fracture? I have seen many people with fractured spineous processes in the lower c-spine that were not pain generators.
What are they recommending?
Mark
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