[dshobbies]

Maria, I think seeing your doctor is a good idea. As mentioned in my previous post, avoidance can lead to serious consequences.

Judy, you're entering uncharted territory. So are you kids and so is your husband. I suspect, among other things, he's crashing right smack dab into a full blown mid-life crisis. The liquor, the display, all sounds like a teenager doesn't it? Even the girlfriend, ending a 28 year relationship for something 'better'. Hey the grass is always greener, right? (Have you ever noticed these sayings are so appropriate when you're living through them? Birds, zebras, horses, etc. simply means other have lived through the exact same things - over and over again.)

Perhaps years from now, when you can look back and past the pain, you'll even say this is the best thing that ever happened but living through this, with health problems that are earth shattering by themselves, is difficult, and that's putting it mildly. You're alone, scared, worried, angry, furious, depressed and all at the same time. The point - everything else is meaningless unless you take care of yourself. I know you've been paying more attention to your own needs so this is just a gentle reminder.

I'd also like to advise you that what Jeff does and how he behaves is probably no longer your business, though you might be as curious as all get-out. However, encouraging your children to drink and drive or drink to the point of drunkenness is nothing but reckless. You might want to mention something the next time you see him. However, if he wants to put on a show for them, since no juveniles were involved, that's between them, even if in poor taste. I think for me, learning this would be my biggest hurdle so I wish you good luck.

I'm glad you had company last night. I'm sure it felt good to talk.

Dale