[Maria]

Judy,
I keep checking back here to see what new developments may have taken place. I have to tell you I get worried when someone keeps quiet or distant as I think the wheels are turning re what the person is thinking. If your husband doesn't want to talk to you there is a reason. I personally think it's guilt and wanting not to face you esp. after you said he came home crying and hand holding and saying he couldn't leave you. Then he was gone. Now he's making it difficult to have contact. Sounds like he's afraid to face you and your children because he's ashamed of himself and what he's planning.

I could be so far off it's not even funny but I'm not giving him the benefit of the doubt. I've had too many friends that were taken by surprise by their spouse in terms of divorce and they didn't really want to do it but were forced into it more or less. The one thing I can say is it's best to put your emotions aside when you're thinking about your financial interests and that of your children.

Just get yourself to the bank as Dale recommended and empty the joint account or go ahead and transfer enough into your own account to pay the rent if necessary. After all you're disabled and you're not working and you were abandoned (left without world/communication).

I don't know if that is what an attorney would suggest tho I'd do this at least make sure this month's rent is paid if you've not been able to reach your husband about it and do it before he empties the account. In order to remove your name from the account he has to have your signature so the only thing either of you can do is empty that account or deduct from it.

Call some Divorce attorneys quickly. Get in some consultations even if by phone if they'll do that. He's not really giving you fair consideration so why should you give it to him.

My friends that have done the best with their divorces are the ones that took the bull by the horn, got a really good attorney and did what they had to even tho they still were in love with their spouse. There's only so much one should have to deal with emotionally and someone has tipped that scale a bit too much for you.

Please we understand what you're going thru with your back and recovery and we are devoid of the turmoil you're currently going thru so better able to give some clear thoughts on action to take (and when). I truly wish I was closer so I could at least offer you a ride here and there.

Hang in there~ Maria