[dshobbies]

Jarrod,

How easy it is for us to tell you to hang in there when we have some semblence of a life. Having walked in your shoes, I know this really doesn't help because there's always a but at the end of all our stories. Either we've improved or we haven't. Waiting to improve is too long and not improving is unthinkable.

But one thing you do have in common with just about every fellow spiney is your depression which is quite evident in your postings. Aside from any other meds you might be taking for pain, you need to immediately get on an anti-depressant. I know how everyone tends to fight this, perhaps due to a feeling of entitlement that you've earned your depression or you aren't really depressed, just in a lot of pain. Trust me, you're depressed and whether or not you improve with time, whether or not you need revision surgery, your life will be greatly improved with anti-depressants. This is not a one size fits all and it may take trying various combinations but your outlook on life will improve and you'll find yourself able to tackle what comes next with a better sense of moving forward.

This is not something you should do, it's something you need to do. If you take away one thing from everyone advising you different things to do or not to do, please heed this advise.

Dale