Kathy, welcome to the forum. I'm so glad that you found us. I'm also glad to read that you understand the importance of the decisions that you'll be making. It's my recommendation that you take a step back and don't consider yourself hurtling into a surgical decision. Consider yourself immersed in the process of trying to gather the information you need to make an informed decision about your treatment. Don't make the surgical decision until you are ready and have all of your questions answered.
You might not like all the answers you'll get, but you'll still need to take responsibility for the decision... so slow down, make sure you understand the relevant issues. Then, when you do decide, hopefully, it will be without that panicked feeling.
I have one client who has had a baby and returned to a normal life after ADR in her mid 20's. She had a 1-level Charite' with Dr. Zeegers at the AlphaKlinik in 2002. That was a wonderful success. She has a wonderful baby boy. Unfortunately, her cervical spine went south and 3 years after coming back to life, she found herself disabled again. Fortunately, she was able to go to Dr. Bertagnoli for a 3-level cervical procedure and that too was a wonderful success. Hers was a very unusal case and I hope to put more on her story page. Take a look
here. I'll see if I can get her to come and post about pregnancy and delivery after lumbar ADR.
Again... welcome!
Mark