[grantwb1]

Well I am finally home and on the couch as I write this. I did not get to speak with the doc today. I always like the assurance of speaking with him. Making it home was quite a journey. Thank God that I have family helping me, the first surgery i had no idea how disabled I was going to be. I still have only been to one doctor that has actually conveyed to me how bad this was really going to be. I really think that these docs have really taken the cliche its all relative and ran with it when they tell you the effects and the possible outcomes. I almost jumped at one doctor cause the answers he was giving me were just so much more negative that what the rest of the other docs I had seen were saying. This is one of those areas where I really used Mark almost endlessly. He really did help me fish through all the bullshit some of these money collecting doctors were saying.
Well I am waking up really stiff. some meds coffee and a small stroll takes care of that though(not completely). I am now in the all day hunt in trying to find the best resting/sitting/tv/video game position I can find. Man there are a lot of variables to adjust back there to make happy, and ooohhh weee let me tell you that if you twitch wrong it almost feels like you just had a major muscle group removed instantly. The most difficult thing for me is the nerves supposedly waking back up. Well how do I make them filet mignon and eggs with cinnamon rolls? WOW this can eat your brain with the thoughts of what did I do or Is that permanent, or is this going to stay like this and then get worse?!!!!!!!?!!!?!! The doc opened me up quite a bit so I am tryiny to fight off the the tyrannosaurus of runaway paranoia. I am having a pulling nerve pain on the outside back part of my thigh that was not there pre op right now that I am going to ask the doc about. It only happens when I am moving strangely to try and not move the way I am not supposed to

I am now on just oral meds and will call the pain doc first thing Monday morning to re-access. I thought I hated moving up on meds, lol they asked me to move down and I am still cussing them about it. I really wish I could carry around 5 minutes of my pain in pills, would probably get a lot more communicated but would also probably have to carry around diapers and tissue paper for the babies!!!!!!